Treat Her Like A Lady

 What are the of the questions today?

     Curiosity is increasing as more and more people are asking the question – “What is a five Star Man?”  I had the pleasure of dining with friends and relatives just this weekend to discuss just that.

What I enjoy most as we elaborate on the books content is the fellowship of friends, family, and acquaintances. There was one individual that was under the impression that the Five Star rating system was to be used to rate both men and women.

What is the Five Star System?

This Five Star system is used by women only to determine the stability of the her prospective spouse.

We’ve come a long way over the last 40 years. Nowhere is this more evident than in our music.  I found a youtube video I’d like to share from years ago that reflects the attitude of that day regarding how women should be treated.

Just for a moment let's reflect on how things should be as opposed to how they are.

Do men seem to be less caring and considerate when dating?

 Dating Motivation

All actions whether positive or negative stem from a reason or reasons for acting – in other words…. motivation. We go to work because we’re motivated by the money and the constant reminder of life without work. We travel because we’re motivated by the desire and anticipation of the experience.

We maintain our health because we’re motivated by the consequence of neglecting it. When we participate in sports, music, dance, etc. we’re motivated by our passion and the personal fulfillment we receive while participating. We care for our families, households, and friends because we’re motivated by our love and commitment to them. So, we can say we’re motivated by consequences, desire, passion, love and commitment. Without motivation, there is no action, and if there is action, it may be accompanied with negative connotations. Which leads us to ask this question – what really motivates men? As women, we have the ability to do things purely out of love. Consequently, we expect this would also be the mindset of men, which I suspect may not be true. Could it be we’re motivated by love, desire, and commitment while men are motivated by passion and consequences? When a relationship reaches the stage that a man begins to show disinterest it usually means he is no longer passionate about the relationship and is not concerned about the possible consequences of its end. When we women end a relationship, it usually means we no longer desire to have him in our lives.

We must note that a man can be passionate and still not be in love. It’s only when we combine one of our motivational elements – love, and one of his motivational elements – passion, that we really have the ingredients we need for a lasting relationship. Ladies, a man, can’t have passion for anyone or anything he doesn’t value. So, show your worth – respect yourselves and see what a difference it makes in your lives.

Should women pursue men?

 What’s wrong with pursuing?

I received a comment on my Facebook page today in response to the post of my banner. The banner read “how to find the man every woman is looking for.” This statement was a concern for the person who commented on it. The reason is as she stated that women should not pursue men rather men must be the pursuers to which I fully agree.

 I believe this for various reasons. The first reason is that when a woman allows herself to be pursued it adds to her own attractiveness. Secondly, it is designed that the male pursue the female. Thirdly it’s a motivation killer. It is that way with all living creatures. There’s no reason to believe it would be any different with human beings.

 So, what was originally phrased as “how to find the man every woman is looking for” can also be phrased as “how to recognize the man every woman is looking for.”